I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Randomize
