If i come over, it means nothing
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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