oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
