He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
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