Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
