Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
