I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
There's always time for handjobs
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
