I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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