that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
