You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Randomize
