like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
