school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
