YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
