her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Randomize
