so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
