We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Randomize
