Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
you win again, gameday.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
