Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Randomize
