Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
