I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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