i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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