What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
