i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
