Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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