she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
