i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
My dick has a subreddit
Randomize
