i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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