Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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