I think I am morally bankrupt
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
