Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
