whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize
