you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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