I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
my shit smells like andre
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize