My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize