i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
