I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
