I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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