I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
