just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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