hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
