ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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