We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
