So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Randomize
