hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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