Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
