bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Enjoy the penises
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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