i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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