Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
