just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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