She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
